December, 13th 2008

Today, I still cannot be a consistant person. I must learn more and more. I should create the chance, not wait until the opportunity came. I go to Campus Library Center. I'd waste much my time doing unuseful thing. I couldn't leave my old addict: Internet!

I'm supposed to earn money from it. But, if I've done this, I'm not studying another. I am a poor person with less personality.

This day I'd waste much of my money to buy drink, food. I hate being like this. I want to back to the past and take my-4th class spirit to fight. Ouch, damn! How to manage myself? So, difficult, is it? Probably I should have the paper planning for my activity. As long as my lifetime, I feel the loneliness. I have no one that understand me. I had no one that could accept me in real myself. I still not found the person who has the same idea, same destination, same dream and the same habit. Even my 'little boy' are different.

I'd phoned my Mom. I told her that I need more money to pay the University administration. It's about 1 million rupiahs. A large number for my family. Then my Mom said that she would look for the loan from family or neighbour. My father promised that the money would be sent to my account soon. At least, on Monday. But it will be next week I thought.

Hm, to entertain my confused self, I'd gone around my large campus by using bus. How long is the way??